Archive for July, 2013

We’d like to hire you for a medical trial. We want to pay you to be infected with a virus.

Side effects may include conformist behavior, answering the same questions repeatedly, having multiple bosses, red tape, seemingly unnecessary requirements, constant justification for staying in this medical trial, frustration, fatigue, depression, loss of self-worth, lethargy, listening to buzz words, dehumanization, and poor fluorescent lighting.

You should expect any or all of these side effects for about 40 hours across 5 days; however, flare-ups have been known to happen during off-hours, weekends, and vacations.

Some rights reserved by danielfoster437

Some rights reserved by danielfoster437

When people call me, which thankfully isn’t often, they have this bad habit of asking me what I’m doing or what I’m up to. I usually just respond with “nothing” or “not much.” You should know that this is a lie. Really, what I mean is that I don’t feel like I’m doing anything noteworthy, at least as far as you’re concerned.  I’m not building a birdhouse or carving a statue or painting  a car or learning origami.  Usually what I’m doing is watching some of the episodes collecting dust on my DVR or reading articles I’ve saved in Pocket or reading a comic or catching up on Twitter or clearing out Feedly or maybe you called while I was writing this.

You see, I wasn’t doing nothing.  I’m harldy ever doing nothing.  I’m definitely not one of those people that has to go out all the time. It’s not a crime for me to stay home. I have plenty to do. I have stacks of magazines and books that are crying out to be read.  I stay pretty busy when I’m home.  So just know that when you call and ask what I’m up to or what I’m doing… just know that I’m probably doing something that means something to me but probably isn’t going to register much on your importance scale.

And now I think I’m going to go ride my bike.